please forgive my bad English and typo.
I just read someone's translation in chinese and then translated it in English.
Actually, I don't really understand well, but, you will have an idea what he was talking about.
Yoshiki wants to share the same experience with those (I guess: for the people who lost their loved one by committing suicide)
Mid. January in Hong Kong:
10 years after, with the reunion, X Japan started the world tour in Hong Kong. X Japan is still very popular, everyone loves the smiling Yoshiki on the stage.
Yo: "when I think about the only grief in my life which can never cure, is the suicide of my father, well, how can I explain this feeling?"
In Yoshiki's home town (Chiba) The seaside is 10 mins walk from his home
Yo: " I used to go fishing here"
Question: what is your best memory?
Yo: " since I was here several times a week, I didn't have much feeling about this"
Q: you came here with your family?
Yo: "Yes, with my mother and brother"
Q: when something (bad/unhappy) happened, do you still come here?
Yo: Yes, although it's not really like some soap opera, but, it's really like this way.
His Dad has passed away when Yoshiki was 11 years old.
Yoshiki went back to his primary school.
Yo: oh, it"s here, I can still remember, the school is quite big. It doesn't change much, the building is still the old same. It was the old feeling.
Yo: I used to join a music group after school. Although it was the summer holiday, I still went back to school to practice. What was it, maybee trumpet ?? I can't really remember. After the practice, I went back home and saw my Dad laid (on the floor??) at home. I thought he was sleeping. But, only a triangle cloth was placed on his head. Just like this, I was so shocked. I even asked: why did he sleep in this way? At that moment, I lost my temper and cried.
Q: what is the reason you lost your temper?
Yo: I don't know, my family stopped me later. If (he) just took his life without consciousness, it only left a big question mark to the family. (we will) never know the true answer. (he) just walked away and left this question, then, the only way I can survive is to chase the answer to this question forever.
Afterward, no one talked with him about the death of his father.
His memory with his father is fishing, and, his Dad played the piano to him.
His Dad was 34 years old.
Q: with the sudden death of your Dad, how can (you) overcome the pain.
Yo: oh.. this pain cannot be overcame. The pain is still struggling in my heart. It pain will not cure when it was hurt in this way. you can never understand.
He suffers with the pain (one who can never understand this feeling without experienced it) and live until today.
Yo: because I am a musician, I am dependent on it. How about without music? to tell the truth, I cannot imagine how I can live without music.
the song "tears" was wrote with the memory with his father.
Yoshiki has invited 200 orphans to the Hong Kong concert. It was the first time Yoshiki has sent invitations. After the concert, he made a donation to the orphan organization.
Yo: mmm. (I) feel like why not to do something for the others?
how to say this? It's because of the sympathy towards my father and because of my pain. They understand what our family went through, it's really difficult to accept. then, (I) consider the ones who was left behind and think I can do something. Japan is a country with a very high suicide rate. (if I) want to do it, why not now than later? I am planning to establish a charitable foundation.
Although there is no concrete plan, the willing to help and support the orphans is stronger and stronger day by day.
Yo: when (I) plan to establish the charitable foundation, I think I just cannot push it. Anyway, I am a musician (a rock and roll one). it seems that they (when you put them together) are not too
appropriate. There is no necessary to change the luxury life style. No need to get the approval from everyone. Only myself is enough. I just think, it"s not voluntary, I just do it because I want to do so.
Yo: maybe some people think that it's hypocritical. But (I) just want to start to do somehing.
Back to the studio from the home town: this is the new X Japan song after one year. Yoshiki wants to write something about the courage of life. this is the first time he helped the other, and it's how he faces his own life.
